Church Times cartoonist, creator of the Church of England’s zaniest parish, and a priest in real life, RON sets forth some daring theories:

• The Mother’s Union and Forward in Faith are actually part of a vast organisation that has infiltrated every town and village in the country – known as the Church of England

• Flower ladies are activist members of an international brigade with a determined mission to decorate churches everywhere

• Bishops not only wear archaic ritualistic robes, they attend exclusive meetings – these are known as synods.

• Higher powers in the Church want you to think of this as a new collection of St Gargoyle’s cartoons – and that’s exactly what it is. Will you be duped?

Ron says that all his cartoons are based on something that has actually happened to someone in a church somewhere. Full of recognizable eccentrics, this has the added frisson of conspiracy theories running throughout. Where do collections actually end up? (The bank, as a rule.) Are there coded messages in the typical weekly sermon? (It’s unlikely.) Can you survive the C of E without this revelatory volume? Yes, but it’ll be less fun.