The authors take a fresh look at the gender debate in the church. Rather than roles, the authors examine the Scriptural emphasis on relationships, specifically brother-sister type relationships based on love, humility, and mutuality. Instead of defining structured roles for men and women as argued by complementarian or egalitarian positions, this \"relationarian\" approach can be lived out in the existing structures of any culture. Focusing on relationships can enable the church to move beyond the divisions of the gender debate. Rather than two camps, complementarian and egalitarian, we can be unified in one camp by focusing on the type of relations that are an attractive missional witnesses to the world.