It's an alarming moment when it dawns on parents that their child is in trouble. And if you aren't perceptive you may never know until you find a half-smoked marijuana joint in a jeans pocked on laundry day or a sexy love note left inadvertently on a dresser or a citation from the police.

In times like these, when children are making adult decisions that are often devastatingly destructive, parents must examine the facts and learn how to be what their kids need them to be before it's too late.