Mental illness can be hard to understand, and even harder to accept when your child is diagnosed with it. For approximately ten years, my daughter Ashton and I searched for answers regarding her symptoms: tiredness, low energy, and no desire to engage in family activities. We were searching for a physical or medical diagnosis. Not until after Ashton's first suicide attempt was she given a proper diagnosis of Bipolar Disorder.This book reflects on our journey together, how it affected our family, and how I as a mother struggled with my daughter's illness. I doubted my effectiveness as a parent and blamed myself for the hell that Ashton had to endure. I have a nursing degree and worked many years on a telemetry/medical floor, and that is the direction my mind was leading me while searching for answers. I studied mental health in nursing school but never thought that Ashton's issues where linked to a mental illness.I learned that education on mental illness was very insightful, as is education on any subject. It was a subject that we were not familiar with.My faith was tested, but also strengthened by this journey. At the time, I felt abandoned by God; but, now that I look back, I can see how He was with us all along I wrote this book to encourage and help others dealing with a mental illness, but also because of my own need to write it, and found the writing therapeutic for myself. I have written this book using fictitious names at the request of Ashton. We live in a very small community and I wanted to respect her privacy.