The Dating Dilemma

Many of you might recognize Rachel as the face of BBC’s, No Sex Please, We’re Teenagers, programme, which aired in 2005 and the author of best-selling book for girls, Cherished. Others, as the ubiquitous face of Harrow, North West London, where she can often be found shopping, drinking coffee and chatting to strangers (including animals, like in a Disney film) whilst writing profound insights on teenage sexuality.

However, a small majority of you will have no idea who she is. For those unfortunate few: we introduce the vivacious Rachel Gardner, founder of Romance Academy by day, lover of period-dramas and husband, Jason, by night.

Romance Academy is a revolutionary relationships project that tackles teen pregnancy and underage sex head on. We address the underlying causes of risky youth behaviour such as, poor self-esteem, low aspirations and lack of positive family/community life by promoting the value of stable relationships through our unique 14-week intervention project.

Our aim is not just to encourage young people to delay sexual activity, nor do we simply point them in the direction of contraception. Our aim is to give our young people the tools to make intelligent choices around sex and relationships.

Romance Academy began life back in September 2005 when the BBC showed a three part documentary called No Sex Please We’re Teenagers which followed the lives and loves of the very first, "Romance Academy" - Twelve teenagers from north London were challenged to give up sex for 5 months, so that they may explore the true value of relationships and the positive and negatives of delaying sexual activity.

Romance Academy is now a national resource, affecting the lives of hundreds of teenagers every year. To do this we train Youth Workers all over the country to replicate the RA model in their hometown. Through creating a positive community where young people can appreciate themselves and others, we instantly remove them from external sexual pressures and allow them to simply ask: 'who am I?'

Boy meets girl.Boy and girl go on romantic dates.Boy and girl establish healthy boundaries, share their hearts and fall in love.Boy buys ring.Girl says, ?yes?.Boy and girl get married ...

If only it was this simple!

How do you recognize real love amidst the multitude of other things that go hand in hand with it: infatuation, lust, desperation, attraction, hate? How do you know if the person you are going out with is the person you should spend the rest of your life with? How easy is it to get it wrong??

Rachel Gardner and Andr? Adefope look at God?s guidelines for romance. They ask the difficult questions, but they also ask how God helps us to change - how you can become a godly boyfriend: confident in who you are, supportive, worthy of respect; or a godly girlfriend: sure of yourself, able to nurture selflessness and generosity in relationships.